My Dysfunctional Relationship with Twitter

I became a Twitter member June 16th, 2008.  A friend of mine “invited” me to join and, at the time, I had never heard of Twitter.  I remember thinking it was a strange concept.  Why would I want to announce to the world what I am doing throughout the day in less than 141 characters?  It sounded like a waste of time.

Anyway, I wrote one tweet that day, something about typing naked.  I am sure the friend who invited me, my one follower, didn’t appreciate the visual.  

I left Twitter like my cat feels- neglected (My cat only thinks she’s neglected, but really she is well taken care of and well fed.  Gotta fatten her up for Thanksgiving).

I have had an aversion to social media in general mainly because of the whole time-wasting aspect of it.  Not too long after joining Facebook, I started wasting an hour a day to learn nothing new about my friends.  Occasionally, I would learn about marriages, deaths, cool trips and relocations, but most of the time I learned who got a new fake pig on their new fake farm.  After that, the last thing I wanted to do was maintain a presence on Twitter.

Then I published a book.  Every article I read said you need to get on social media to promote your book.  I reluctantly returned to Twitter like Gomer returning to Hosea (That’s a Biblical reference for all you heathens).

I have discovered the wonders of Twitter, the ultimate tool in shameless self-promotion.  Twitter allows interaction with people I’ve never met.  Before my return to Twitter, I was trying to go back to the old well of friends on Facebook.  I am sure I’ve pissed some of them off trying to continually peddle my novel.  

On my first day back with Twitter, I had two people follow me just because I changed my profile to reflect my writing endeavors.  It was as if a whole new world had opened up to me and I was Jasmine giggling on a magic carpet ride.  

Now Twitter no longer sits neglected.  Instead, I use her like Rooster Cogburn used Blackie (That’s a True Grit reference for all you heathens).  And, if you are a new self-published author, I invite you to use her too.