Musings on Constipated Angst

There's a lot of angst out there.  Yeah, we're all stopped up with it.  Sometimes what we need a good ol' perspective laxative.

It's easy to get caught up in the "woe is me" syndrome.  It happens in every vocation and job I've ever been in.  Humanity tends to focus on the bad.  It doesn't surprise me when I see a message board or a blog where someone is bemoaning something about the vocation of writing.

Personally, I love writing and that's why I have a whole blog where it's just fiction writing five days a week.  It's the type of thing you choose to do because you love it, not for money or pats on the back.  So enjoy writing and flush the crap from your mind that's stopping you from enjoying it.

This has been a public service announcement from your friendly Stuart Matthew Davis.  

Birthdays- A Tool to Help in My Plan for World Domination

I will dominate the world!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday was my birthday and inevitably people ask "What do you want for your birthday?"  Rather than ask for something for personal pleasure, I asked for money or things that would help my writing and publishing career.  I want my work and my writing in everyone's hands.  Rather than dipping into savings or getting a loan, utilize those people around you who will give you something you need and you don't even have to ask- They will ask you because it's your birthday!

If you are truly passionate about something like writing or any other endeavor, use those special occasions like birthdays to futher your cause.  Don't ask for a shirt or a wallet or a watch...unless that shirt has an advertisement for your business on it.  Even better, buy other people the shirt for your birthday, then tell them that what you want for your birthday is for them to wear your shirt out in public.

In short, sacrifice the smaller pleasures in life for your pursuit of world domination....however you may define it.

Mood Reading for Writing

Just like romance, sometimes it is helpful to get in the right mood for writing.  Depending on the type of story or book I'm writing, I like to read something in a similar style or genre beforehand.

For instance, my current fiction blog serial  is a crime thriller with lots of dialogue and some odd characters.  I read some Elmore Leonard to get in the mood.

I'll be writing my follow up to The Last Chance Players in the next few months, so I'll be reading my personal favorite writer, Ross MacDonald.  He wrote some of the best hard-boiled detective fiction and I hope to one day write as well as he did.

Anybody else ever do in any mood reading?

Noir Movie Review- The Lineup (1958)

Why you should see it-  The Bad Guys.  The villains in this movie are the most interesting characters.  They fly into San Francisco to retrieve some heroin from innocent people who have been made drug mules unaware.  The drugs are stashed in dolls and silverware and the like.  The bad guys are pure evil and yet they somehow come off as interesting and attractive.  The actors playing the trio are great, headed up by Eli Wallach, most famous for his work as Tuco in The Good, The Bad and The Ugly.


Why you shouldn't see it-  The Good Guys.  They are boring.  This movie was based on a TV show I had never heard of.   If the show was anything like the movie, I can understand why I had never heard of it.  The movie starts out as a police procedural with way, way, way, way too much exposition(did I emphasize way enough).  You have to wait almost a third of the way through the movie to get to the bad guys who provide the meat of the movie.

Take my Poll!- Genre Benders

In light of Cowboys & Aliens coming out this summer, I was thinking about some genre mash-ups that I would be interested in writing.  I have a few ideas that fall into genre bending territory, but I wondered what you, the reader, would like to read the most.  Would you rather read.....

1)  A Western Noir

2)  A Post-Apocalyptic Western

3)  A Young Adult Heist book

Let me know in the comments below!

Movies That Suprised Me By How Good They Were Part 3

It seems the only way you can see the movie Illegal is in this two-pack above.  I rented this movie because I am a sucker for actors who are characters unto themselves-  Bogart, Eastwood, Nicholson and to a lesser extent the star of this film, Edward G Robinson.  Forever he will be known as the classic gangster.

In this film, he doesn't play a gangster, but a DA who has fallen from grace.  He ends up making waves as a small time defender who is beyond crafty and is able to nab the scum of the underworld he couldn't get to as a DA.

This movie is fast paced, fun and other good words that start with F.

Movies That Suprised Me By How Good They Were Part 2

I had never seen a Burt Reynolds movie I really liked until this one (nor have never seen a Burt Reynolds movie I have liked since).  I Netflixed White Lightning when I was on a Seventies car chase kick.  I wanted to see as many movies as possible with 70s muscle cars and I liked the grittiness of 70s movies.

This one was toward the end of that kick because I was running out of good movies.  I had low expectations.  Based upon Burt and based upon the plot I was expecting a cheesy Smokey and the Bandit type movie.  I was wrong.

From the moment the movie started, I was drawn in by the music and the scenery.  It was a serious movie with Burt turning out to be the baddest redneck I had ever seen.  This movie is certified Seventies cool!    

Movies That Suprised Me By How Good They Were Part 1

I picked this Speghetti Western up at Wal-Mart for 99 cents a few years back.  Needless to say, I thought it  would barely be watchable, but its pretty good.  Great score, good story and the coolest ugly actor ever-  Lee Van Cleef.

That's something you just don't see in a major Hollywood production today-  A lead actor with as much character in his face as LVC here.  Shoot, even when they have a lead part that calls for someone ugly they take a good looking actor and use make -up and crap to do the job.

But I digress.  Is this movie Shakespeare?  No, but it is a fun ride and has this odd ability to make me come back to it again for a second and third viewing.  

Stu's Video Review- Just some silliness

This is a video of me making fun of my own less than high brow tastes.

What I have to do today!

1.  Vacuum
2.  Clean Bathroom

3.  Shave because I've neglected to do so for three days

4.  Do something that could actually make me money
5.  Write
6.  Shower because I haven't done so today and it's almost 2pm

7.  Eat because I haven't in three hours
8.  Write
9.  Write
10. Write

Do My Reading Selections Negatively Affect My Writing?

I picked up these books at a used bookstore here in Houston:  Some Women Won't Wait by Erle Stanley Gardner and Green Light for Death by Frank Kane.

 I love the old pocket book paperbacks.  I can put one in a cargo short pocket and read it whenever I am in a waiting room or at a red light or performing open-heart surgery.  I love the slang and the syntax of them-  A cigarette is never "lit" but "lighted" and a "swish" is not a term used in basketball.  Plus, these suckers are cheap entertainment- 2 books for three dollars!

The problem is they are not great books.  They are not classical reads.  They are not the classics even in their own genres.  My junior high English teacher, Mrs. Oakes, would never let me use one of these for a book report.

While Gardner is known as the creator of Perry Mason, the novel I got does not feature his well-known character.  When I looked up Frank Kane, one of things they mentioned about him was his "consistency".  That is not a great compliment.

Lately, I have started to wonder if these books are negatively affecting my writing?  Is it "garbage in, garbage out"?  Or does reading books that no one else does give me a fresh and different perspective that  others do not have?

What's your opinion?  

Why I love Internet Self-Promotion

Like I said yesterday, I went on a job interview.  It was a sales job.  I sat in a large room with about twenty other people, waiting to be called back for my turn to show that I was the best candidate.  

The guy who called me back and interviewed me was probably in his mid-twenties, wearing a nice suit.  He had dark slicked-down hair.  Rather than a full beard, this guy had a thin, manicured line of hair that hugged his jawline and went from ear to ear.  Down by his chin, two equally thin, manicured lines came straight up to the corners of his mouth and over his lip, forming a small and tidy mustache.  

I made no assessments about the man from his looks (although I am sure many of you already have) because all I knew at this point was I was about to be interviewed and I preoccupied myself with making sure I was the best I could be.

Then the guy talked.  After asking me where I heard about the job, he says “You know, I can’t hire half the girls sitting out there.”

I say, “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah, you look at their resume....”  He pretends to be looking at someone’s resume.  “...So your name is Shaniquafondalonda.”  He then pretends to put the resume in the trash.

In case you weren’t sure, yes, he just told me he wouldn’t hire someone because of their African American name.  

The first thing I think is “Don’t you know your company can get sued for your comments?”  Then I come to realize that this isn’t a trained HR rep or a trained hiring manager, but this guy is a cocky jerk....and probably a top salesman.

Sure enough, he tells me he’s doing commercial sales and that very few people get to do commercial sales in the company.  He tells me he has a residential sales position open though.  

During the course of the interview he also pulls out a 100 dollar bill and says “Damn wife, I make all the money and I have to ask her for cash.  I mean, a hundred dollar bill is good lunch money, but still, you know.”

This guy was definitely over the top, but this hasn’t been the first time I have come across salesmen who was trying to portray the image of confidence and success.  

The real sales world leaves a bad taste in my mouth.  I do not like to put up a facade.  That is why I like selling on the internet.  While it might be uncomfortable at first to promote yourself, it is a whole different ball game.

I love that the standards for selling books on the internet are so different than the real world.  There is a cooperation that is hard to find in other areas of life.  There is an expectation that when you promote yourself, you will also add value and encouragement to other people doing the same thing.  That way, you garner an audience for yourself who will eventually start buying your books. 

The worst thing you can do is hard sell your books by constantly leaving messages saying “buy my book now, buy my book now” at every turn.  People will turn you off, “unfollow” you and drop you from all their social network options.

I have likely told many of you nothing new, but I believe I can offer you this piece of encouragement- If you are uncomfortable with self-promotion, the paradigm created by internet self-publishers has made it more tolerable, even enjoyable.  People will welcome you even if your name happens to be Shaniquafondalonda.

How I've Dealt with the Guilt of Self-Publishing

I feel guilty indulging a passion of mine- self-publishing.  I know it happens to many self-publishers and writers- I have read books that say so. They give great pep talks on why you deserve this little slice of happiness and therefore you should stop feeling guilty about doing something for yourself.  Screw your family and get writing (Okay, none of them say that last part, but sometimes that’s the impression I get).  Anyhow, this guilt must be a common experience or these great gurus of writing wouldn’t bother.

This is all well and good, but when you get into the realm of self-publishing(beyond simply writing your book), you feel the need to promote your work 24/7.  What happens when you spend all your time promoting your book?  Also, what happens when your passion isn’t paying the bills for your family (yet)?  The strains of time and money we put on our families are a major consideration.

I have tried to have multiple sources of income beyond self-publishing, but so far they have been multiple sources of expenses.  My wife’s job has virtually been the sole support for my writing lately.  So what’s a poor little self-publisher to do?

I had to ask myself, what do I want?  Do I want to write?  Yes.  Do I want to make money writing?  Yes.  Would I like to one day make writing my sole source of income?  Yes.  Do I want that more than a good relationship with my wife?  No.

I guess this is the ultimate question-  What is more important?  Do I pursue a dream and forsake my relationships?  If I reach my goals and destroy my relationships, will I be happy?  If my dreams go unfulfilled but my relationships are fulfilling, will I be happy? 

When it comes down to it, a fulfilling life is one where you are continually growing in your relationships.  I would hate to come to the end of my life and say that I neglected those closest to me to fulfill a dream.  I don’t want to sell a million books and die alone in my secluded cabin surrounded by bottles of my own pee.

You may be wondering if I gave up on my dream.  The reality is you have to love writing for the sake of writing and not as a means to get rich.  If I have to give up some more hours in the day just to get a regular old paycheck, fine.  I can still write on the side and the promotion of my work will suffer a little. 

So, no, I haven’t given up on my dream, but I have given up on the idea that my other nontraditional sources of income will provide some “in-the-mean-time” money.  As a result, I’ve been looking for a job and went on a job interview this morning (more on that tomorrow).

The take home lesson, kids, is that you can write and promote and still love, but make sure love comes first.  I continue to strive to keep those priorities straight.

My Dysfunctional Relationship with Twitter

I became a Twitter member June 16th, 2008.  A friend of mine “invited” me to join and, at the time, I had never heard of Twitter.  I remember thinking it was a strange concept.  Why would I want to announce to the world what I am doing throughout the day in less than 141 characters?  It sounded like a waste of time.

Anyway, I wrote one tweet that day, something about typing naked.  I am sure the friend who invited me, my one follower, didn’t appreciate the visual.  

I left Twitter like my cat feels- neglected (My cat only thinks she’s neglected, but really she is well taken care of and well fed.  Gotta fatten her up for Thanksgiving).

I have had an aversion to social media in general mainly because of the whole time-wasting aspect of it.  Not too long after joining Facebook, I started wasting an hour a day to learn nothing new about my friends.  Occasionally, I would learn about marriages, deaths, cool trips and relocations, but most of the time I learned who got a new fake pig on their new fake farm.  After that, the last thing I wanted to do was maintain a presence on Twitter.

Then I published a book.  Every article I read said you need to get on social media to promote your book.  I reluctantly returned to Twitter like Gomer returning to Hosea (That’s a Biblical reference for all you heathens).

I have discovered the wonders of Twitter, the ultimate tool in shameless self-promotion.  Twitter allows interaction with people I’ve never met.  Before my return to Twitter, I was trying to go back to the old well of friends on Facebook.  I am sure I’ve pissed some of them off trying to continually peddle my novel.  

On my first day back with Twitter, I had two people follow me just because I changed my profile to reflect my writing endeavors.  It was as if a whole new world had opened up to me and I was Jasmine giggling on a magic carpet ride.  

Now Twitter no longer sits neglected.  Instead, I use her like Rooster Cogburn used Blackie (That’s a True Grit reference for all you heathens).  And, if you are a new self-published author, I invite you to use her too.

Get off Your Duff and Start Self-publishing!

Some people wonder if there is a need for another blog on self-publishing.  You might ask "What expertise do you add to this subject?"  

My answer- nothing.  That's right. nada.

My hope is that I become an encouragement to other new self-publishers.  You've got to learn by doing.  I'm going to put into practice what I learn and jump in.  Blind.  And you're going to hear about it.

You'll learn my mistakes, my troubles and my triumphs.

Hopefully, there will be others out there who will see this and decide that they too can put away their fears.  Fear is the great killer of human achievement.  To quote a crazy man (10 points if you can guess who), "Fear is the dark room where the Devil develops his negatives."  I have no idea what it means, except that fear sucks.

 Screw fear.  Get out there with reckless abandon and start publishing blind too.